Today has been a hard day for my sweet Hannah. There are many possible reasons why (tired, bored, hungry), but the core of the issue is that she does not want to obey. This afternoon I asked her to put a cap on the marker and she walked away from me. I reminder her to "listen and obey" to which she turned to me with a scowl on her face, said, "Humph" then slowly walked over and put the cap next to the marker. Yup, another challenge. My heart sank. I was tired, she was tired, and I knew this would not go well. She ended up being sent to bed for rest time early where she spent the first few minutes yelling from the bed, "I want to listen and obey. I want to! Let me listen and obey, I really want to!"
I was frustrated by Hannah's plea to try again. I so eagerly wanted her to know that I know she will not always obey, and in spite of that I will
always love her. She did not have to "try again" to win my approval. She needed to see that she was wrong, apologize and then we could move on.
How familiar is that? Paul says in Romans 7:15-18 "For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out."
But there is hope in Romans 7:24-8:1 he continues to say, "Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin. There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus."
Now, instead of being frustrated by my daughter's plea to try again, I am humbled. I am in the same sinful state she is, with God trying to remind me that He will
always love me, and that He is just waiting for me to turn back towards Him.
Praise God for working through my girls to teach me about His love and forgiveness. I am in no way a perfect mom, wife, sister (in-law), daughter (in-law), friend, neighbor, or so on, but there is no condemnation through Christ Jesus and that is an amazing gift!